I like memoirs, we know this. I also think that everyone has the right to a memoir, as long as you can tell a good story and you know which stories to pull. I was so excited to read Robert and Jane Rave’s mother-son memoir about Robert coming out to his mother in a letter. That letter is the first chapter and what follows is a series of vignettes by Robert, all followed by a short reaction written by Jane titled “Mama Says.” The love and interaction between Robert and Jane is evident and I loved that his parents were totally okay with him being gay. The point of this memoir is that it is not really a coming out story; it’s the story of how a mother and son grew to be better friends because Robert, and therefore Jane, accepted who he really was. In that sense, Robert and Jane are really adorable. They clearly love each other and their family is so strong, so I loved reading about that part of their life. I loved seeing Jane stand up for her son in the face of discrimination in their small town. I loved that Robert truly cared what his mother thought of him.

Unfortunately, I really didn’t love everything in this memoir. The biggest issue I had with it is that it seems dated. Much of the “action” of the memoir takes place in the late 90s, but he was clearly writing it now. With words like “tranny” and “cyber geek,” it was just a little difficult to take seriously. This is 2011, we don’t say things like that anymore, even if you did in 1998. The majority of the memoir talks about things like waxing, going on horrible dates with horrible men, good friends and bad friends, some of whom are nameless celebrities. If it reads like some kind of chick lit novel or memoir, you’re right. Unfortunately, I don’t like those stories when they’re penned by women, so it stands that I wouldn’t really like them when they’re penned by a man.

I guess this is another case of the book not meeting my own expectations. I think the book could have been organized a little better and been less cheesy, but at the same time, I’m sure there are plenty of people who would enjoy this book. And I know there were parts I really liked. I liked Jane. She’s not a writer, as Robert mentions towards the end of the novel, but I really liked many of the things she had to say. There were times when I cringed at things both Robert and Jane said, but I think for the most part they presented their relationship well. It’s a loving, beautiful relationship and I am glad they decided to share it with the world, even if I didn’t love reading about it the entire time.

Thanks to TLC Book Tours for sending me this book to review. You can read more about this tour, including past and future tour dates, here.

There are certain things that you learn about a blogger the longer you read their reviews. I hope you know, for instance, that I don’t mind not finishing a book. I don’t mind discarding a book if it’s not keeping my attention, but it’s a lot harder to justify doing that for a blog tour. So I tried. I really tried very hard to finish My God, What Have We Done, but I just got to the point where I realized that I was spending so much of time convincing myself to read the book, convincing myself to just pick it up and read. It just wasn’t worth it after a while. I read almost 200 pages and I just don’t think my reaction would be any different after nearly 500. Frankly, as soon as I made the decision not to finish the book, I felt relieved.

I think where My God, What Have We Done failed was twofold. First, the connection with Oppenheimer and the Manhattan project would have been as poignant without the unnecessary sections that tried to detail Oppenheimer’s life. Unfortunately those sections were dry and, beyond not holding my attention, were also unbelievable. I’m sure Weiss did a significant amount of research, but I just couldn’t find it in myself to believe the way she told the story. I could turn to any of these pages and point to woody dialogue, awkward phrasing, characters that simply didn’t feel real.

I’ve been reading the reviews of this one on the tour to see if other bloggers felt similarly. I was especially interested in Steph’s review, in which she expressed extreme dislike for Pauline. And while I have to agree that I didn’t necessarily like Pauline, I actually enjoyed reading about her. Especially after the birth of Jasper, I thought Weiss hit her stride describing the life and attitude of Pauline as a mother. If this had been the tone of the entire novel, I certainly would have kept reading, even though the sections with Pauline as a narrator were not without fault. The nonlinear timing of the story could have been a useful storytelling tactic, but instead felt gimmicky and confusing. Pauline is a frustrating narrator, but at least she is consistent and most of all, I believed in her and her voice. Like Steph, I found myself skipping over the sections that described Oppenheimer and his life almost completely. I would skim here and there for important information, but I wouldn’t spend too much time on them.

I hate to not finish a book for a tour, but I don’t think reading the last 300 pages of this one would have given me any different a perspective than the first 200. Pauline’s obsession with Oppenheimer was interesting, but I think, in the end, her point is obvious and a little heavy handed. But Pauline is the kind of person who would love a heavy handed metaphor, so maybe it works.

Thank you TLC Book Tours for sending me this book to review. You can find out more about the tour, including past and future tour stops, here. 

I am almost getting to the point now where the information that a book is a “novel in stories”  makes me cringe. There are times when it is done wonderfully and beautifully, like Olive Kitteridge and there are times when it fails, at least in my mind, like Great House by Nicole Krauss. But when Lisa of TLC Book Tours approached me about reviewing this book, something didn’t make me cringe. Something made me accept it. It could have been Lisa describing my reading tastes as “eccentric” (a high compliment if you ask me) and telling me that this book would fit right in. She was right. I really enjoyed Ivan & Misha, I thought that the connected short stories tactic was done brilliantly.

The short stories themselves are told in different styles, with different narrators. They are not sequential and the story is filled in in bits and pieces. Ivan & Misha are fraternal twins, opposites in every way. Misha is gay and Ivan is beyond defining in one word. The best way to describe Ivan is in love. With himself, with his brother, with his lovers regardless of gender, and most of all, with the world. They immigrated to the United States when they were young boys after the death of their mother.

Their story is complex, but Alenyikov tells it will a brilliant fluidity, moving from past to present and everywhere in between without tripping up himself or the reader. The prose is lyrical and beautiful; there are entire pages that I wouldn’t mind quoting. Each character is so complete and it amazes me how short this novel is. There was so much contained within its pages, in my memory it must be longer.

There is one scene that will disturb some people. In a way, putting it at the beginning of the novel is Alenyikov’s biggest risk and perhaps it is the defining moment of the novel. The one that the entire novel is working to explain how a relationship between two siblings could become so confusing, so complex. But whether you agree with his decision or not, the relationship between Ivan and Misha is one that deserves an entire novel to explore the complexity of being between two cultures, between defining moments in your life, between life and death.

Thank you to TLC Book Tours for sending me this book to review. I apologize for having the review up a day late – I have been feeling a bit under the weather and ended up falling asleep last night before I could post it.